Hold That Boat

You don’t even need to be a photographer to make one of these “holding the boat” photos work. The fact that they couldn’t pull it off and still call themselves a photographer is just sad…

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  1. Using the force I see.

  2. Brandi

    Viewing the photos on this site makes me feel a million times better about my own work!

    • Yeah. It can get a bit like that sometimes. 🙁

      • Yea, I come hear each day afraid that I will find one of mine. :-0

        but I do feel much better when I leave…

  3. If you saturate it, they will buy.

  4. I have some grave concerns for that cameras metering…..

  5. Even if they did get the angle right, how would that work? She’s holding the front end of the boat? Why would you do this with a boat?!? WHY?!?!?

    I always thought it was a kindness to not publish “Derp” photos. Everyone has them. Mid blink or whatever, it happens to the best models… However… We don’t PUBLISH them with our studio name on it!


  7. Anonymous

    Does anyone else think the boat looks fake, or is that just me?

    • I thought so too. Looking at the size of it compared the the trees. To me it looks too big, too close to the tree line, and the bottom left of the boat may be a shadow but looks to me someone was trying to cut and paste the boat, cut a little too much and tried to fade it so it didn’t look so square.

      • The ship is either the Edwin Gott or Edgar Speer run by the Great Lakes Fleet. The place looks like it might be Detour Passage in the Upper Peninsula. And the ship is in fact real.

      • Thanks Ken – I was looking at the great lakes ships too…

      • And this is about how close they run up there. Also keep in mind, the ship is about 1000 feet long, so you’re looking at it from a reasonable distance.

  8. Shaun

    The fauxtog used a point and shoot, obviously. The view finder and lens don’t line up in those. I know, I used to have one and found that every time I tried to do something like this, it never worked.

  9. NicCole

    Okay, the concept clearly didn’t work out, but what about HER? She looks terrible! There’s no light on her poor face, you can barely see her features… was the photo supposed to be highlighting the ship? Because we don’t really need her in there if that’s the case?

  10. FalconGTHO

    She looks pasted in and so does the tanker. This is like a clip art assemblage. Wtf? Actually, EVERYTHING about this pic looks fake, cut and pasted.

  11. Timothy

    I saw a 10 year old pull this off with a cell phone. I’m just say’n.

  12. Kelli

    If she’s supposed to be holding the boat…shouldn’t her palm appear to be TOUCHING the ship? Just one more in a series of mistakes that makes this pic an EPIC FAIL!

  13. Nobody has mentioned her expression. Pretty awesome, IMHO.

  14. Angela MacIsaac (@that_angela)

    Fill flash? No? OK, carry on.

    • Grimoire

      But flashes are for when it is dark, not during the daytime. Any fauxtographer could tell you that.

  15. Managed to focus on the boat, not her.

  16. Henny

    i like the blue water… j/s

    other than that, it looks like the ship is on a river. but it looks a bit like an extremely big container ship and right now i am wondering how it got on the river in the first place. i am a wee bit confused (i’ve seen big container ships on rivers, just not that big. that seems to be an ocean going container ship).

    as to her holding the ship, her arms were simply not long enough.

    • It is not a container ship and I’m pretty sure that’s not a River but Detour Passage in the Upper Peninsula.

  17. Could be a great lakes ship – they look like the real deal, but are shallower draft, plus there are numerous bays where you could get that background.

  18. Kelsey

    ummm nice pointy elbow

  19. Even if you take out the boat-holding fail, it’s still a bizarre mess. Take the girl out so it’s a picture of the boat, and it’s bad. Take out the boat, and the picture of the girl is bad. Nothing is right.

    People, just because you took the photo does not mean you need to upload it into your portfolio! Why is this so hard to understand?

  20. Snappy

    Why someone would even come up with this idiotic concept is beyond me. It’s worse than the badly photoshopped Russian wedding photography.

  21. The odd thing is that it would be trivially easy to get her hand touching the boat with Photoshop. That wouldn’t solve the multitude of other problems, but it’s the one that stands out most. It’s the one thing they were obviously *trying* to do, and failed. In my opinion failure is worse than unconscious incompetence, ’cause you’ve let yourself down.

    I mean, I can see how the basic concept of interacting with the distant ship might work. If they’d made it look as if it was coming out of her trousers, like a giant metal cock. Or she was touching it with her feet. Or elbows. That would have been awesome. Of if the boat was sailing out of her mouth. But they picked a boring idea and then messed up.

  22. Debbie

    ok i see no picture now. somehow i missed this one when it was first posted but i see now that where the image was it says its no longer available. i guess whoever posted it mustve found it on here & deleted it! lol

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