French Maidalien

She’s so sexy… bet you’re just green with envy! No wait, she’s green. Well maybe she’s nauseous? No wait, she’s making us nauseous! I don’t get it.

← Previous post

Next post →


  1. As Orion slave girls go, I’ll pass on this one

  2. Tyrohne

    Don’t make her angry… You wouldn’t like her when she’s angry…

  3. sharon g

    Incredible Hulk’s daughter?

  4. Holy shit that’s bad.

  5. why is she green…..?????

  6. Jennifer? I’m so sorry…

  7. Helen P. "Mickey" Megginson

    Oh for heaven’s sake!

  8. Wow…a green chick even Captain Kirk couldn’t do….

  9. Stacy G

    The scary thing is how the backdrop looks like red blood cells. Is it a hidden message warning you that she is harmful to your health? And I love the freaky armpit. Ewww!

  10. I love the harsh shadow behind her. Nothing says “on-camera flash” like hard shadows. And nothing screams fauxtog louder than using on-camera flash

    • There are plenty of pro photogs that use on-camera flash properly, this isn’t one of those times.

  11. Good lord. Never thought I’d see the day when Fiona got a boudoir shot done for Shrek.

    Yeah I know, usually I’m all *don’t blame the model for blahblahblah* but in this case this is an unflattering horrid pose – and if she doesn’t realize that a straight-on hootch to the camera shot is always a bad idea (unless you’re being shot by professional smutmeisters for a very large sum), then shame on her for allowing the fauxtog (who probably suggested this tasteful angle) to shoot this.

  12. JonnyRobes

    No… that’s just She-Hulk!

  13. BurninBiomass

    In retrospect, the uranium sex toy might have been a bad idea.

  14. Shrek or the Hulk ahh everyone beat me to it 🙁

    Truly rubbish

  15. Somebody needs to give up control of the Hue/Saturation slider. This is ghastly.

  16. Nice love handles……….maybe she should go on a diet. Obviously whatever she is eating is not only unhealthy, it has a bit too much green dye in it….

    • Dear Grace, I clicked through to your blogspot site of awesomeness and saw your interesting Easter pictorial. For someone who seems to know the Bible so well, you missed the parts about loving each other and letting God be the judgey one.


      • thank you! It was actually an asignmeant for a class. I had to create four conceptual photos of how I was saved. I am actually working on another photo that tells more of how God has really influenced my life. Particularly through my capacity to love more. Thank you for the feedback. 🙂

      • I really don’t care, Grace. But if you’re filled with the love of God, you shouldn’t feel the need to point out someone else’s love handles. Imagine for a moment if that was a picture of you and someone pointed out your flaws.

      • The hypocrisy of religion.

      • Hey Angela can I just ask what does her religion have to do with her comment? If she was buddhist, hindu, atheist, whatever else you probably wouldn’t say anything. They all have the values to be kind to one another. Just because she’s a Christian doesn’t mean she can’t be human, and that her religion is the one to blame on the “love handles” comment.

      • I’m sorry. I misunderstood your first comment. I thought you were referring to my photos, not the comment.
        I realize it was not a kind thing to say, and I really shouldn’t have said it. I want to apologize for that.
        Flash, there is no hypocrisy in religion. However, I am a human. And as such, I am prone to error. The part where religion comes in is, I can learn from my mistakes, move on, and not do it again. And God is there to help me every step of the way.

    • it’s about the fauxtog, not the model. A good photographer should try to work with the model and suggest things to make the most appealing photos, accentuating the model’s good points and downplaying the others. I can’t find anything redeeming about this photo manipulation but I wouldn’t say anything about the model because all i can see is a really bad photo that would make the most perfect woman look like a freak.

  17. -108 on Hue
    -49 on saturation
    brings this into a normal range.
    it’s not exactly an improvement..

  18. That isn’t hanging labia, is it? Please tell me that isn’t hanging labia.

  19. As long as the fauxtog was making her green, you’d think he’d at least airbrush out the armpit discoloration. And do something about the wonks and the uh… is that visible labia? For my own sanity, I’m gonna pretend they’re just thigh rolls. Or, maybe suggest a more flattering outfit (one that actually fits?)
    I’m pretty sure this lady wanted to look good in her photo, not like a mutant alien hell-spawn.

  20. buggalugs

    That is a MAN.

  21. Rasec

    My god … Fiona’s erotic photoshoot …

Leave a Reply