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@Bill – Ha!
I did talk to her a little bit about aperture, depth of field, ISO, etc. I told her that most of the photos she was asking me about were shot with my 50mm f/1.8 lens, which she said she’d “look into” (not with a cybershot you won’t). I couldn’t think of a polite way to say “but really it’s because you need to learn. A lot. And then learn some more. And practice. A lot.” I take stuff like this – http://imgur.com/a/FfqkB – semi-competent but unremarkable (some of those are older, that newborn is almost two now and I wish I had had better skills then), and she has no idea how to I do it, and people pay her with actual money. I just… buh…