Bad All Over

What’s black and white and bad all over? This photo!

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  1. They should try harder to keep the original straight when they photocopy something.

  2. BurninBiomass

    You know, I thought at first this was a bad photo. But now that I have seen the exclamation mark after the word “Photography” in the name, I obviously changed my mind.

  3. Why does the vignette look so hand-drawn? And the choke is all wrong. It looks more like a really bad inner shadow effect.

    And the poor model is going to get a backside full of splinters once gravity kicks in and she slides right out of the picture.

    • Jilly Jay

      It looks like maybe she might avoid the splinters. She’d be going with the grain. 🙂

    • justhypatia

      Because it was hand drawn… round brush tool with the opacity lowered. I… don’t know what to say…

  4. brokenfocus

    Egads. The first thing I noticed out of this photo was the hunched over look of the woman I’m assuming is the mother. She looks so cramped up. Having her sit upright and getting a little closer would have been a start to reversing this terrible photo.

  5. The mother should have used a pacifier too. It seems that all female heavyweights ask for a false photographer to have their pictures taken.

    • Canaduck

      “It seems that all female heavyweights ask for a false photographer to have their pictures taken.”

      I…what? Huh?

    • I fail to see the correlation between the model’s weight and the fauxtographer’s crappy work. Let’s stop blaming th models!

  6. Yeah the hand-drawn vignetting (sp?) is really the worst thing about this picture.
    Aside from all the other worst things about this picture.

  7. Heather

    OMG you just gave me the best money making idea in the world. I’m going to make a Faux-photo frame. That way when your Fauxtographer takes a picture like this you can hang it on the wall with the awesome tilt and not ruin the picture by placing it straight.

  8. Well, this is okay I guess… but could you maybe try to get a shot where I look even MORE like a hippopotamus with a skin rash? And are there any shots where my infant looks a little more terrified? Maybe tilt the photo a little more, I want the people looking at it to get vertigo. Oh–that wiggly hand-drawn vignette looks good, now all we need to do is overexpose it so everything looks grainy… aaaaand… PERFECT!

  9. deadeye

    OK, lets see, you are overweight, with most of it in your middle and neck. How best to accentuate this? I got it!Let me sit you down and hunch forward. Wait a minute. it’s still not unattractive enough.Bam, Black and white and blow out the highlights. Turn it off center and put crappy border around. Luckily the kids expression is one of near terror so that’s OK.
    Another masterpiece done. Next stop sepia.

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