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I’m Really Sorry

I know, I know, I’m a complete jerk for posting this. I know you’re cursing me for clicking over. I know some of you might even lose your sight for a few days. I needed people to commiserate with.

P.S. That StumbleUpon thing we told you about ends in a few days, just a FYI.

 

90 Comments
  1. Meichelle Johnson says:

    Oh for heaven sakes. You killed my eye sight.

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  2. KK LaRue says:

    Brings on a whole new meaning to stars and stripes!

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  3. Stacy says:

    Liquefy. Airbrush. Blur. SOMETHING!!

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  4. Mary says:

    omg those poor stars are gonna be sooo misshapen when she finally gets her pre-baby body back… **tattoo fail** ok… so they’re a bit misshapen now as it is. im sure she’ll never notice! **tattoo double fail**

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  5. valerie says:

    I think the oversaturation caused the stretch marks to “pop” out even more, but personally i think it’s a cute concept just executed poorly..

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  6. mo says:

    I had no idea you could tattoo a watermelon.

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  7. Gene says:

    I’m so glad I already ate breakfast long enough ago

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  8. Angela says:

    There are a TON of free actions that you just push play! It will get rid of those unsightly stretch marks! Can’t do anything about the trashy tattoo though!

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    • Wsroadrunner says:

      Clone, soften, clone, soften… delete delete delete

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    • Anonymous says:

      I belong to a site ( a great photographer) who would disagree with the stretch marks being ugly. It’s part of woman hood, it’s our battle scars as the photographer would say, and she would not edit it out. But this photo is overexposed, or rather, very badly high screened and the brightness/contrast was turned up. This would have been a fairly decent photo if it wasn’t messed with. I don’t like the busy shirt as it’s a distraction, if she was trying something artistic well, I rate it a 4 out of 10.

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  9. Jes says:

    So we are supposed to be ashamed of our stretch marks? The tattoo is poor but my eyes didn’t lose their sight..

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    • Mary says:

      i don’t think you should be “ashamed” of your stretch marks but if you photographed someone with acne wouldn’t you touch it up? i guess i would say that stretch marks are blemishes that i would want taken out if it were me.

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      • Ashley says:

        Some women wear their stretch marks as a badge of honor; and rightfuly so. But the saturation here is a bit too much.

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      • I’ve never met one!

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      • Ashley says:

        That’s a little sad. I’ve met many. There’s even a site for woman who are proud of thier “war wounds” and show photos and tell their stories. I guess it’s a little like believing in the tooth fairy? lol!

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      • Erin says:

        I’m riddled with stretch marks and although I’m not about to rock a bikini anymore I’m very proud of each and every one because they’re the result of the amazing baby currently sleeping in my arms! However, that said, I photoshopped a couple of my maternity pictures to soften them so I could post my pics. They were VERY purple at the time lol

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      • Amanda says:

        I’ve never met a woman who is proud of them either… I have them, but I can’t tell which ones are from the baby and which ones are from me just getting fat on my own. So… I’m not proud of mine.

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  10. Kenny says:

    Wow… Wouldn’t be a bad shot if it weren’t for that it is a BAD shot!!! Wow… My head hurts thinking how bad that looks…

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    • Clarissa says:

      Jeez. Please pass the Tylenol. The Sharpie-Tattoo gives new dimension to the word “tacky”. My eyes hurt.

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  11. Susan says:

    Is it just me or do the star tattoos look like they’ve been applied with a felt tip pen?

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  12. pam says:

    This just makes me sad on so many levels.

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  13. ewww says:

    It actually looks like someone drew the stars on with a sharpie

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  14. Rayna says:

    okay, so the shot could’ve definitely been done differently, but what’s up with all these comments making fun of the woman’s belly? this is You Are Not a Photographer, not You Are Not Allowed To Get Pregnant Because Your Stretch Marks Will Gross Me Out. leave that woman out of your criticisms and mocking, people! the thing about making fun of someone’s shitty photography is that it’s something they can change. making fun of someone’s pregnant belly, well, that’s just unfair.

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    • rm says:

      Agreed. What if mom didn’t WANT her stretch marks edited? They are kind of a battle scar, really… Just a thought.

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      • Crystal says:

        Absolutely. I think the picture is fine. There is nothing wrong with stretch marks. Like the above poster said this is You are Not a Photographer. We’re supposed to be making fun of picture quality and poor editing. In this case.. her belly ACTUALLY looks like that and there is NOTHING wrong with it. Here goes another reason to make women feel terrible about themselves..

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    • J says:

      Agreed on not making fun of the woman… I’m a mom of three, and personally I *like* maternity pictures with bare bellies. BUT I think there is still legitimate criticism to be made for the photographer to do a better job hiding or disguising the stretch marks… If it were my belly, I would either want some major photoshop action or at *least* turn the picture black and white… but if I really wanted a bare belly pic of my stretch marks (which I wouldn’t!), I would ask that it NOT be posted online. It’s like if someone took a “professional” picture from my teenage days of horrid acne without doing anything to try to disguise it. It was my face, and I hope in essence it was beautiful (like this woman’s belly), but sometimes a little help is required to let the beauty shine through and not let the flaws become a distraction. :-p

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      • You Are Not a Photog says:

        And it’s not even the fact that the photog didn’t hide them. It’s that the photog makes them look worse with over saturation and posing.

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    • LTP says:

      Thank you. Making fun of the ‘models’ is crossing the line, imho.

      I was reamed by a random person for posting a pregnancy photo of a mother that included un-retouched stretchmarks. It was a lovely photo, and the mother was proud of her battle scars and looked beautiful… body policing is totally not okay. Period.

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      • Liz says:

        I thought EXACTLY what several of you thought this picture was probably looked at and approved by the mother. There are many people who are getting back in touch with the “art” of being pregnant and for those of you who say you have never met one oh well too bad they are out there and while I’m all for making fun of stupid prop ideas or pictures where people are obviously trying to be “creative” but this website is full of snooty people who don’t realize that photography is supposed to be about art and this is a perfect example that sometimes some people really ask for what they get and they love it and yes they display it in their house(umm oh why don’t we make fun and tell on them!) Get off your high horses about the mom’s belly and honestly SHE probably picked the shirt and SHE probably LOVED the pose and i bet her stretch marks are just really that color I don’t think this pic is edited at all. I’ve seen a lot of bellies and I think this is authentic untouched.

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  15. Wsroadrunner says:

    Well, I guess I cook the ribeye tomorrow night instead…

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  16. John Martin says:

    Looks like a good first candidate for “youarenotatatooartist.com” as well.

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  17. rebecca says:

    Ok, just gonna throw this out there….everyone, picture this….Daddy is gone to war, so we are going to take a picture of mommys preggo belly for him…maybe they were GOING for the patriotism theme with the dog tags, the intentional felt tip pen tattoo and the not so subtle red stripes!!!! It was all intentional…right?

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  18. Shauna Q. says:

    Ahhhh! I think her baby colored all over her belly from the inside.

    P.S. There is something masculine about this picture. Could be the slightly mannish hands, could be the dog tags, could be the big button down shirt. But something about this photo makes me feel like I’m looking at a pregnant man.

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  19. Daphne says:

    eek….but that said, “some” mothers dont want any editing on their belly’s…..you can make it more flattering though!!

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  20. Crystal says:

    This isn’t a bad picture. What you’re criticizing is the mother’s stomach and that’s not right. It’s cute the way they subtly did the stars and stripes theme. And for all you guys know, maybe one of her younger children drew those stars on her belly? This picture isn’t terrible at all, not compared to some of the other things you have posted on this site. I’m kind of disappointed actually that this would make it here. There is nothing bad about the photography, you’re all just butt hurt that they didn’t edit out the stretch marks?? Give me a break.

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  21. CCP says:

    her jeans makes her look like she has an erection!

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    • Ashley says:

      …which is something the photog should have done something about since she can’t see that part of her jeans without a mirror!

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  22. rob says:

    I honestly don’t understand this post… just bc the image isn’t photoshopped automatically makes the person who took “not a photographer”? Maybe it wasn’t a “pro” photographer who took it, maybe it was her friend who just happened to have a better than avg camera. While i do agree that majority of people who own a DSLR should not be calling themselves a photographer, why judge someone on one photo? The photo, while not attractive is actually correctly exposed and is showing something real, not all covered up and fake.

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    • Brey says:

      Rob, they do not post any old images found on the web. They only post images from “professional photographers” who sell their work. So this is not just a friend with a DLSR playing around. And your point about the photo not being attractive is why it’s posted here to begin with.

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  23. debbie says:

    the big belly of life,the stretch marks and protruding belly button, are all good…. BUT THE STARS ……they gota go, sorry

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  24. Kelli says:

    Oh my….no! What a horrible disservice to that woman!

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  25. Kate says:

    wowwweee! I think I opened my eyes so wide in shock just there that I strained my eyelid muscles.

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  26. amber says:

    Yes, the saturation is way too much, which really brings the purple out of the stretch marks. A lot of you say she can be proud of them, but clean it up a little. Why? she’s obviously not doing GlamourShots. Did it occur to anyone that she WANTED the realism, and sincerity of her baby bump? I admittedly edit over mine, bc I do feel insecure. Yet I have no problem wearing a little bikini all summer, with no editing! I say, to each his own. But to slam on a pregnant woman simply bc her photog is an idiot isn’t right. Pregnancy, and embracing it, is beautiful. If you don’t like it, stop looking. I bet at least 95% of the asses on this thread trashing this woman would do far more visual and emotional damage to viewers should THEY ever stop hiding behind their monitors, and show their true, united, physique

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  27. Lily says:

    Geesh Ladies come on,why do women take everything so personal ? Plain and simple,this pic is gross !!

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  28. christa says:

    am i the only one who saw the dog tags around her neck? i think it would look better in b and w, maybe then you wouldnt be so drawn to the color of the belly, and it was a bit closely framed for my taste.

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    • amber says:

      @lily. You have your opinion, as the rest of us do. Just shows that you are either not a mom, totally insecure, or are just a bully. Knocking something so natural and intimate. Leave the woman alone. It doesn’t even look like stretch marks, just veins under the surface from the pressure against her skin.

      @Christ: apparently you read almost none of this thread. The dog tags were mentioned quite a few times

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      • Angela says:

        I agree 100%. This is a very natural and intimate photo – and therefore we have every right to make fun of the photog for having the poor taste in posting it on the internet! This is not something that anybody other than the women ad possibly her husband want to look at!

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  29. Don says:

    Who the hell thinks these baby bump photos are a good idea? There’s a reason sitcom mothers are filmed standing behind the sofa when they get knocked up.

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  30. Brey says:

    Okay okay everyone can get off their little soapboxes about how the woman might have wanted her stretch marks showing or whatever. Im getting a very “holier than thou” impression from a lot of these posts. I’m all for women empowerment and being proud of your belly as a mom and all that hoopla, but as a photographer, why on EARTH would you use this to market your work to potential future clients? I don’t care what you say about stretch marks being natural and normal and all of that, it is NOT an attractive picture. The end. If a client wanted these images, I would certainly take them, but I would NEVER use them as a marketing tool as is, because. . . it’s not attractive. And there is nothing wrong with saying this is unattractive. Sorry, but this is not one of those “natural is beautiful” cases. The stretch marks surely tell a powerful story of previous pregnancy and birth and make a statement about being a woman and having that honor, but that doesn’t mean that it is aesthetically beautiful.

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    • Anonymous says:

      Word. I’m pregnant and think this is an absolutely horrible photo. Honestly, I don’t like the bare belly shots to begin with and one like this should have been kept private.

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      • Liz says:

        Do any of you ever think of the fact that the people who run this website collect their pics from all over and this pic was possibly put up by someone who shouldn’t have with no care to the person who paid for the picture in the first place? How do we know it was paid for? Yes I know many so called photographers (people who buy a DSLR and think they have a buisness) but some people don’t charge money for the work they do and if a person wants something specific it should be done even if it’s not “professional” looking..if people had money to go to a big professional they wouldn’t be going to friends and family with “nice” cameras to take pictures. Let’s not forget that photography has lost it’s poetry, lost it’s art. Those of you who have made a professional buisnes out of it good for you but some of us want to just capture memories and see and capture the beauty(raw untamed yes almost ugly at times) of people. THAT is true art that is what photography used to be about

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  31. SG says:

    My retinas, my retinas!!!!

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  32. Gourmetguy says:

    Aaaaarrrrgggghhhhhh…….!!!!

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  33. I actually gasped out loud!

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  34. IF the photographer had cleaned up the stretch marks and smoothed out the skin, this actually would be a good photo in my opinion. I never photograph bare bellies for maternity shoots (I find it a little uncomfortable), but this is a pretty well composed and colorful picture. It needs some touching up for sure if you’re going to use it in your portfolio.

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  35. Richard says:

    my god it’s like some sort of gourd you’d see on a farm!!!

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  36. mika says:

    the image is not so bad… the fauxtog just went way way overboard with processing. she could have been kinder to her model – I would expect to see stretchmarks but not ones that look like they’re ready to rupture! it’s just not flattering. clearly the fauxtog upped the saturation (among other things) unless the model has jaundice..her hands are way too yellow. I don’t mind seeing stretchmarks – please show me one mother who doesn’t have them… like Katt Williams says “we know stretchmarks come from 1 of 2 ways: either you was big and you got small – or you was small and you got big”… I would be worried if a woman in her 3rd trimester didn’t have any! As photographers – doing portraits – you should try to make your client/subject look good… not fake and not hideous. Think of it this way – if this client paid for this image beforehand…what on earth is she going to do with this image?

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  37. bellum says:

    Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
    Good God What the fuck is wrong with people.
    Someone tell me how he or she took this photo and edited it and did not get grossed out
    Maybe their blind? I effin hope so

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    • Anonymous says:

      Dude. Get over it. From a critical point of the ‘photographer’, it’s not a good image. But, don’t get rude about the lady’s stomach. It happens. A lot.

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  38. Derp says:

    This is why it’s important to look at a photographer’s portfolio before posing or paying. Bad lighting, bad composition, bad posing/dressing, crooked horizon, and heaven help the post-processing! Was it the “landscape” instant preset from a compact camera menu? Baby bumps are beautiful, this picture is not. It’s not about the woman, or the stretch marks, just that both have been made to look awful. At least it’s in focus, although I kind-of wish it weren’t.

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    • Don says:

      Baby bumps may be beautiful to the family, but any photographer that makes money taking pictures of them should be ashamed. It’s one of the most overdone and consistently horrific fauxtog stereotypes.

      I know these guys/gals need to put food on the table, but for heaven’s sake have some dignity and respect for your chosen profession!

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      • Kristen says:

        So I should be ashamed that I take photos in an area that many people want? Lots of people want family photos too. Does that make those bad as well? If the client wants maternity photos, what makes it so bad?

        (Note, I’m not saying this is a good photo. I’m saying maternity photos can be beautiful and tasteful.)

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  39. Anonymous says:

    My stomach did the same thing.. I’d never had a stretch mark until my wonderful son.. By the end of it, my stomach looked like a contour map. I also had an umbilical hernia as this woman appears to have. I didn’t do preg photos.. but if I had, I would have requested the stretch marks be touched up. If the photographer wasn’t experienced enough to do that, I would have requested the image files so I could do them myself. Almost a year and a half later, I’ve lost the weight but still have the loose skin and remnants of stretch marks… Shame on this fauxtog for ruining what otherwise wouldn’t have been that horrible of an image (minus the weird saturation thing going on in the background and the TERRIBLE looking stars.) This poor girl’s gonna have these stretch marks for a long time, she doesn’t need a picture (yes, picture, not ‘photograph’…) reminding her of them.

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  40. Mel says:

    just threw up in my mouth a little bit

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  41. Tatiana says:

    that looks so painful. makes me never want to be pregnant..

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  42. Janet says:

    Things, once seen, that you can NEVER forget.

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  43. Anonymous says:

    I sicked up into my mouth :(

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  44. Wes says:

    What’s really scary is that I’ve seen this sort of thing before almost exactly. I had a friend that was obviously a fauxtographer that once asked me to critique her work. She had taken a shot of a pregnant belly with stretch marks that she didn’t edit out at all (simple healing brush would have worked in this case). When I mentioned that, she got defensive (like a true fauxtographer of course) and said “Those are natural! Not every pregnant belly looks the same!”. Not joking. While every pregnant belly is unique, I don’t know a single woman that actually WANTS to remember the stretch marks.

    But, of course you can’t critique a fauxtographer. They’re professionals after all.

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  45. This is scary!

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  46. Mary says:

    Maybe she was trying to get her shirt to match her belly? And that tattoo…wow, super fail.

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  47. tara2032 says:

    So sad :( I think that the “tattoo” is a FAKE, drawn on with a sharpie…you can see the lines if you look close…but maybe I am wrong…I think she was think military theme, dog tags, stripes on shirt and stars on belly…hmmmm, very strange and poorly thought out…yuck!

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  48. Zeph says:

    I don’t see why people romanticize things so much. Stretch marks are what they are; scarring from skin stretching too much too quickly. They aren’t ‘battle scars’. What battle are you fighting? And they aren’t hideous abominations. They. Just. Are.

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